Writing-Year56-Mon(China)

Forums 2024 Autumn Courses Writing-Year56-Mon(China)

Viewing 14 reply threads
  • Author
    Posts
    • #43469
      VMWEdu
      Keymaster
    • #43598
      Beth
      Participant

      Summary for Lesson 1

      In our first writing lesson together, we focused on descriptive writing, thinking about the three fundamental building blocks: high level vocab, literary techniques and sensory language.  The powerpoint with all of the resources is attached below, which should be used to help write the descriptive pieces assigned for homework. It also contains some really important and helpful links, the inspiration for the gorgeous work the class did on up-levelling their vocab to an even more vivid and sophisticated level, and finally our discussions on sensory language, creating atmosphere, avoiding cliche and using unique and original literary techniques to grab the reader’s attention. The students were absolutely brilliant in today’s lesson, everyone was super engaged and full of fantastic ideas. Really great work today everyone and lovely use of simile and metaphor- very impressive work! See you next week 🙂

      Descriptive writing video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RSoRzTtwgP4

      Video about creating unusual and quirky metaphors: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Wrq6AnYuxI&feature=youtu.be

      Homework

      hmwrk

      Attachments:
      You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43600
      AndyL
      Participant

      homework:

      Attachments:
      You must be logged in to view attached files.
      • #43634
        Beth
        Participant

        Stellar work Andy, well done 🙂

        Attachments:
        You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43668
      July
      Participant

      In the noisy amusement park, color light are flashing at every were. Ferris wheel are spinning. It looked like the colors are spinning. People stand together, having a sweaty smell in the air.Some excited people shouted. We can see the entire city from the top of the ferris wheel.

      • #43704
        Beth
        Participant

        Super work July, well done 🙂

        Attachments:
        You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43669
      ClaireL
      Participant

      The bright lights covers all over the playground, there are red, yellow, blue light stripes are all over the playground. There are people yelling to sell their foods and some others that was shouting on the roller-coaster. There are high and low buildings, but it made the play land more squished.

      Ferris wheels are more than one and there looking’s are different too, some are with long stripes and some have with wooden seats on them. Different shops have light bulbs all around them, and the costumer are different at any time. The costumers for the shops are just like money to them so then when their costumer buy something then they will shout even louder. And the lights made the night that became just like the day, even though it is mid-night, but you still can smell the food’s yummy smell.

      Little flags are the most interesting things, some of them will talk about what will happen in the following weeks, some will talk about what will this shop sell, and some might even say where is the funniest place to go.

      If a wind blows by then you could hear the sound that the people on the roller-coaster make, then you will want to try it too. And the children are telling their mom if they want this or that, or crying loudly, and if you are walking to the playground you might as well hear the noise. But you still can taste the yummy foods for example ice-cream, it is fun but crowed.

      Many of the activities you need to line up for a long time and sometimes when you finished it you thought that it was really fun and you will want to play another time, but then you still need to line up that long so most of your time is not playing but lining up to play. But some activities don’t need to line up so now your time is just relaxing and have fun!

      Going to a playground can make you feel excited nervous or calm. And that’s what you really need to feel the happiness and be relaxed, it is just like a reward for yourself so you need to express yourself and do any thing you want, it is just a place that can make you feel right and to play, so a play ground is really just for all these things to let you feel better.

      • #43708
        Beth
        Participant

        Fantastic work Claire, well done 🙂

        Attachments:
        You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43671
      Mars
      Participant

      I am in a sleepless playground. There are many snacks, which smell good. There are many people, so it is too loud that even a horn can’t be louder than the voice. It is an amazing thing to know that I had never seen a Ferris wheel in this big. Although the wheel is as tall as a tower, it is still very stable and fun, not like a round tower, boring and un-stable. I believe there must have a roller coaster.

       

      The big wheel is so big that it is even bigger than the sun! I have never seen any wheels like this! This isn’t like the tire on the car, it’s brighter. This is the most beautiful circle that I’ve ever seen. I think when we are on the top of this wheel, we will see a complete picture of this playground. It must be lightful, although we haven’t gone up there.

       

      I see a roller coaster on the wheel by accident, and it must be excited. Will it be fast? I don’t know. I think every roller coaster must be excited. But I know that it won’t be a place to look at the beautiful picture. It is also bright but not as bright as the wheel. However, the wheel is not as fast as the roller coaster. I remember my first roller coaster ride was terrible, so this roller coaster must be faster than that, because that first roller coaster is a child one.

       

      After I have finished riding the wheel, I race to the snacks, because I am very hungry now. I saw many foods that I have never seen and make me very want to try them. I buy some for my friends, because they want me to buy some souvenir for the project for introducing anywhere. I also buy some snacks that I met before. The air smells like barbecue, hot dogs, and candies, and my mouth is full of things, too.

       

      What a nice visiting! There are wheels, roller coasters, performances, snacks, etc.! Maybe I should take my friends to this place again. They will love this! I don’t think this place is any worse than other, although I hate the roller coaster, but everything else is wonderful! If next time this place don’t have much people, I will be able to play everything in this playground and talk to my friends.

      • #43710
        Beth
        Participant

        Gorgeous work Mars, well done 🙂

        Attachments:
        You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43699
      Beth
      Participant

      Summary for Lesson 2

      In our second lesson together, we focused on narrative writing, thinking about the different stages to writing a narrative story that we could use to create compelling and capitvating stories.  The powerpoint with all of the resources is attached below, which should be used to help write the narrative stories assigned for homework. It also contains the step-by-step process of story-planning, focusing on the seven elements of narrative writing such as plot, point of view, symbolism and theme. We completed work on how to hook the reader- for which the students came up with loads of amazing ideas such as the techniques of description and in media res. I was super impressed by everyone’s work today, they planned some lovely ideas. Great work everyone, see you next week 🙂

      The video from the beginning of the lesson (the GCSE one): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ee-3qumk6E0&feature=youtu.be

      Homework

      hmwrk

      Attachments:
      You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43771
      ClaireL
      Participant

      The wind blew in the big wild mountain, hikers were walking in a long path with all kinds of voice raring over and over. Suddenly, a huge rain begins wind and rain were a mess, and even some of the trees and plants are uproot and was been blown into the deep valley. And everyone was shocked.

       

      The hikers ran into a mess, some of them said that they would still go and explore, but some think that the need to go to the cave to wait until the rain was over. Then the hikers split up a part, then a huge howl came it was the lion!

       

      Some of the people that is in the cave was save, but the others ran away for their life’s. The lion was more and more close, everyone was scared, but some of the smart people said that they could lie down on the grass and not breath and let the lion think that they already died. So of they did, the people just lie on the cold grass. The lion cached up with them, and got closer, it sniffed and sniffed everyone was afraid that they would be eaten by the lion, and even the people who hide in the cave sweat for them.

       

      But lucky the lion was not hungry it was just curious about the humans, and now the rain stops it is now the time to let the hikers explore new things. But at this moment they were very caution because no one wanted to see that lion again.

       

      Then they explored something amazing that there was a small hedgehog that is in the dirt and was very dirty. One hiker picks it up and put it in her hands and said that she will adopt the hedgehog the hikers heart melted because of the creature that was cute, but no one cares about it.

       

      Then one of them said that they can find the hedgehogs mom, so of they went, they searched and searched, and at last they found its mom in a pond were the waterfall is. The woman fist gave the little one a bath then took it to her mom. It was very warm when the animal and the animal’s mom met, and everyone was happy.

       

      Then they went to see the waterfall it was so spectacular, and all the hikers are amazed, the water it so clear that they even could see some fish swimming in there, this is an artist artwork and the artist is the nature.

       

      The hiking ends up, but that kind of recall can not end it is a time that they face life and death and they survived, and that they’d helped a small creature to find its mom. This kind of experience will never disappear in their mind, t is lovely and full of challenge.

      Attachments:
      You must be logged in to view attached files.
      • #43856
        Beth
        Participant

        Great work Claire, well done 🙂

        Attachments:
        You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43777
      fionaw
      Participant

      On a sunny day, a mountaineering team went hiking together. They are preparing to have dinner on the mountaintop.
      Just as they were climbing up the mountainside, they encountered a very steep slope. Several strong men tried to climb up with their bare hands, but all failed. When they were in trouble, a clever woman came up with a solution: she found a rope. Let the strongest man be at the bottom, and everyone step on the shoulder of the person below, overlapping. In this way, the woman at the top successfully climbed to the top of the slope, tied the rope around a large stone, and the remaining people grabbed the rope one by one and climbed up the slope, finally reaching the top of the mountain.
      After overcoming this difficulty, everyone felt very happy and proud, and their sandwiches and tea became even more delicious.

      • #43858
        Beth
        Participant

        Super work Fiona, well done 🙂

        Attachments:
        You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43780
      AndyL
      Participant

      “It’s you? You killed her, accidentally?” I shouted, astonished. The man in hunting wear stands still, nodding slowly. Everyone was quiet, staring at each other. A woman burst into tears, her husband hugging her tightly. Who is the woman? What happened?

       

      Three days ago, my family and my best friend, Emily’s family went to Rockwell Mountain to camp together. We’re going to stay for two weeks. It was a Sunday, the beautiful blue sky had no clouds at all. The adults planned to meet the famous hunter, Mr. Carter, so they could hunt together and taught us some tricks of hunting.

       

      The second day, when the adults were hunting together in the woods with Mr. Carter, Emily and I decided to play hide and seek. She will be the hider, and I will be the seeker.

       

      Emily was good at hiding. Usually, she stays low and moves slowly until she finds a good spot to hide herself from me. The Rockwell Mountain was so big, so I was a little bit worried about Emily getting lost in the woods. Just as I was about to step and find her, a loud bang of gunshot erupted from the forest, followed by a scream. I was frightened, is Emily hurt, or is it just the adults hunting animals? With my body trembling, I rushed back to the house, shut the door, closed the windows, and waited for my parents to get back.

       

      “Ding!”the door rings. I was scared to answer the door. I peeked out of the curtain, seeing it was Mr. Carter. Relieved, I answered the door. Mr. Carter said straightly:“It’s me. I accidentally shot her, thinking she was a rabbit or some animal. I’m so sorry.”

       

      That explains everything. Everything has been solved, and it’s time to go home.

      • #43860
        Beth
        Participant

        Brilliant work Andy, well done 🙂

        Attachments:
        You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43792
      Mars
      Participant

      What a terrible holiday! It was ruined! I have been all day learning! I am Mars, a five-grade student. This summer vacation was terrible, just because nothing! My parents let me answer questions on a book, and that made me very unhappy. I can still see that dark cloud, right on top of our house. Whatever, everyone else used a real vacation to full their vacation, I used homework!

      It is the most terrible holiday ever. I went on an ordinary holiday, like playing games, or going to other friends’ home. However, after the first week, my mom gave me much homework, like practicing a test. I thought, ‘I don’t need to take that test, why I should practice it?’, but my mom said it, so I should do it. It was too much and too hard! One of the questions is filling the blanks with sentences, and I failed it every time. In my school, I just need to read the passage for one time, even half time, then there will be an obvious answer. However, in this book, even though I read 5 or 6 times, I still think every answer is whether all right or all wrong.

      After I finished the hard vacation, I found out that I really need to take the test, and I passed it. It was hard really, but it was worthy.

      • #43862
        Beth
        Participant

        Fab work Mars, well done 🙂

        Attachments:
        You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43847
      Beth
      Participant

      Summary for Lesson 3 

      In today’s class we continued our writing lessons thinking today about emotive writing. We began by writing short descriptions trying to evoke particular emotions from the reader before thinking about analysing the connotations of words to uncover what kinds of emotions they communicate. We then looked at Pepys’ diary describing the Great Fire of London and then discussed what historical events we could write a characters’ diary entry for. The class created some historical characters and finally touched on what they needed to remember while diary writing. Fantastic work everyone, particularly when thinking about how word choice can make us think differently about emotions in a piece. Well done and see you next week 🙂

      Homework

      hmwrk

      Attachments:
      You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43917
      ClaireL
      Participant

      Covid-19 pandemic

      Beep! Beep! I was a little girl called Dora which was in the Covid-19 pandemic period and was really sick.

       

      My head hearts and my arm were really hot, it was just like fire and I was very uncomfortable. And I hated when the nurse came, she always makes me get many shots and hanging bottles. It hearts a lot and every time it feels very tight and when I saw the blood, I will feel scared. And at many times I will cry.

       

      With my eyes closed I felt like that everyday had been so long that I hope I could be better. Nothing ever happens, in the hospital I could only hear the adults talking but in mummering. I wanted to go back to school and see my friends, play with them and talk about what had happen in school. I wanted to have my old life back, but not just lying on the bed and doing nothing.

       

      One night, when I was going to sleep, suddenly a nurse came with a serious looking, I knew that she was going to give me another shot again. But this time it was the worsts! I had five different needles on my hand, it was just crazy! That night I even didn’t sleep well, I woke up with two big black panda eyes and was very sleepy.

       

      After a wile it was time for breakfast, when the nurse came to give me the food, I am very hungry, so I ate a lot. The warmth of the soup makes me happy. And the nurse happily said that I am not so sick so I could go to out and walk!

       

      I am amazed about it and I thought how many days have, I didn’t breathe some fresh air. So off I went, it was amazing when I saw the plants and flowers and I am so astonished, the world was full of color and things that don’t know.

       

      But happy times was always short, I came back to my room and was going to get other shots. Time passed by I felt like everyday was hard and tuff, but I believe that one day I will go out of this “cage” and discover the new world.

       

      And that day finally came! When the nurse happily said that I am going to go out the hospital, I am so excited that I have no time to eat my breakfast but running out and discover the world! I finally reach the time to go out, although I have faced many challenges, but I survived from that. Until this day I still remembered it.

      Attachments:
      You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43918
      ClaireL
      Participant

      Covid-19 pandemic

      Beep! Beep! I was a little girl called Dora which was in the Covid-19 pandemic period and was really sick.

       

      My head hearts and my arm were really hot, it was just like fire and I was very uncomfortable. And I hated when the nurse came, she always makes me get many shots and hanging bottles. It hearts a lot and every time it feels very tight and when I saw the blood, I will feel scared. And at many times I will cry.

       

      With my eyes closed I felt like that everyday had been so long that I hope I could be better. Nothing ever happens, in the hospital I could only hear the adults talking but in mummering. I wanted to go back to school and see my friends, play with them and talk about what had happen in school. I wanted to have my old life back, but not just lying on the bed and doing nothing.

       

      One night, when I was going to sleep, suddenly a nurse came with a serious looking, I knew that she was going to give me another shot again. But this time it was the worsts! I had five different needles on my hand, it was just crazy! That night I even didn’t sleep well, I woke up with two big black panda eyes and was very sleepy.

       

      After a wile it was time for breakfast, when the nurse came to give me the food, I am very hungry, so I ate a lot. The warmth of the soup makes me happy. And the nurse happily said that I am not so sick so I could go to out and walk!

       

      I am amazed about it and I thought how many days have, I didn’t breathe some fresh air. So off I went, it was amazing when I saw the plants and flowers and I am so astonished, the world was full of color and things that don’t know.

       

      But happy times was always short, I came back to my room and was going to get other shots. Time passed by I felt like everyday was hard and tuff, but I believe that one day I will go out of this “cage” and discover the new world.

       

      And that day finally came! When the nurse happily said that I am going to go out the hospital, I am so excited that I have no time to eat my breakfast but running out and discover the world! I finally reach the time to go out, although I have faced many challenges, but I survived from that. Until this day I still remembered it.

      Attachments:
      You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #43921
      AndyL
      Participant

      English writing class 3

      March 13, 2135
      Today, the U.S.A is throwing bombs to us. I just woke up, seeing everyone rushing around like mice meeting a cat. The U.S.A is the cat, and we are the mouse. I ran outside, not knowing what’s happening now. I saw crazy people carrying toys, foods and other thing to their cars, or even trucks, as if they are going to live on their “moving homes”. Adults shouting to kids, kids shouting to adults, the message passed on into my ears.

      Suddenly, I truly realized that we are dangerous here as I smelled the scent of fire. I raced back to my house, feeling a bit anxious, at a loss of what to do. I remembered that once a time, I dreamed about myself getting lost at a huge amusement park, couldn’t find my phone, running around. But now, it’s in real life, really happening, and I need to do something about it. I took some canned food, a sleeping bag, some communication equipment, and my favorite toy, my car model my best friend gave me.

      The loud noise is closer and closer to us. I jumped on my little truck and raced toward the edge of the city. I needed to drive slowly on the crowdy, muddy dirt road because there were always people running around doing everything but nothing. I felt nervous about whether I can survive this disaster or not, unsure about what will happen next, and sad for those who already dead without knowing. If we can get out of here, we will be safe for now, but not forever.

      Wish me good luck

      Andy

Viewing 14 reply threads
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
Skip to toolbar