KS1

Great job, Samuel!

You have used the vocab we learned in your piece very well indeed. I am particularly impressed by how you managed to get so many of these words in just 2 sentences!

To improve, try not to start sentences with ‘and’ (you could maybe begin it with ‘please’ instead).

Brilliant work!

You have used the words we used in our session very well indeed, and have produced a really interesting piece of writing. Your use of capitalization for emphasis is also fantastic!

To improve, you could also try to add a bit more description to your work (i.e. describe the animals and settings more).

Fantastic writing, Samuel!

This is a wonderful piece and you have done a brilliant job of using the vocab that we learned in the lesson in a really interesting and effective way. I particularly love the way you blend excitement with horror!

To improve, you could also think about using techniques such as metaphor and simile.

Great work, Samuel!

You have used the vocab we learned wonderfully here. You have also done a brilliant job at creating a very exciting story.

To improve, try to avoid using the word ‘but’ at the start of a sentence.