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October 14th 2018
Today I met a small white rabbit.When I saw the rabbit ,I ‘am very curiousness because the rabbit was wearing a beautiful shirt with some rad heart, and I ‘am amazed at the rabbit because he can talk and standing very straight like a human.So I followed the rabbit and I fall into a big dark rabbit hole.
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Excellent work, Leo!
This is a wonderful diary entry. The details you have included create a clear and vivid picture of what Alice experienced, and you have done a brilliant job at capturing Alice’s intrigue.
To improve, you could also mention what Alice plans on doing next (i.e. how does she plan on becoming smaller).
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My name is Alice. Today I am writing my diary about my adventure to Wonderland. It is magnificent there, with things that you can’t imagine and places so wonderful. It is a place where dreams come true. Now, let me tell you how I got there. I followed the White Rabbit to the rabbit hole and I slid down to a world of darkness and just when I thought that would be the last time I’d see light again, I saw the most beautiful garden in my life……
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The writer excite the beginning of the story because it said that Alice dropped into a deep hole. Also it said that Alice was board at the beginning and suddenly she saw a white rabbit.
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My favourite character is the white rabbit, because it is very cute and he has a funny shirt. He has two long ears and two big eyes. He also has a big round ball shaped tail. The rabbit sometimes is very furious. I think he didn’t use his wits, and just because of this he seems very funny to me.
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lesson 4
Charlotte’s Web
My name is Fern. I am telling you my first day with Wilbur. Wilbur is my friend, he always plays with me. He loves milk. I love Wilbur, when I go to school he always waits for me to come back and then I fix a bottle of milk for him. As his owner, I make sure that he has a healthy, happy diet.
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Wonderful work, Caleb!
This is a really beautiful diary entry. You have included some lovely details about what Wilbur is like and have clearly captured how much Fern loves and cares for him.
To improve, you could make it more obviously a diary entry by adding the date and opening with ‘Dear diary,’.
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E.B. White made the opening exciting because he was able to create an attractive story. He wrote that Wilbur was weak. So Fern’s father decided to kill that pig. Fern didn’t want her father to kill Wilbur, So she stopped her Father to kill Wilbur.
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Great work, Tia!
You have thought very well about how E.B. White makes the opening exciting. The examples you have given are excellent, and you have described the important qualities of the characters wonderfully.
To improve, you could also think about other elements of the text (i.e. the chapter titles, the mysterious character of Charlotte).
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Fern’s secret diary
Dear diary,
Your name shall now and forever be Hermione, the best friend of Harry Potter.
Do you know, today, another inocent life was saved by me! Wilbur. My pet pig… not exactly… Dad was about to kill him cause he was a runt, but I disagreed.
He said I could keep him for a little while! I was so happy, I couldn’t even find a good word to describe it! What would you do, Hermione?\
After a week, I said ‘He is so cute! I love him!’ But dad looked miserable and said ‘Sorry, darling, he has to go to your uncle’s barn, you can go visit him…’
Imediatley, my heart felt as if it was about to break down. I pulled my heavy heart up to my bedroom and cried. I knew what they would do…
‘THEY ARE GONNA KILL HIM’ I screamed in my heart, ‘I gave him an incredible name, fed him each and every day, all that was nothing… NOTHING’
would you do the same?
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Dear Fern
Hola! sorry… that is hi in spanish.
I know what you feel like, I feel the same, once I read your things. But this world is cruel, I do disagree with that killing him…
They still stand a chance on living, why kill him, right? Imagine if you were Wilbur, whatt would you feel? Tell that to your dad.
But I am here to comfort you, chat with you, watch over you, care for you, and most importantly, love you.
Fern, trust me, he won’t die, you’ll see! I am not a fortune teller, but I feel it in my… let’s see what body parts I can mention… oh, yeah! I am a diary. In my ‘heart’
Just trust me!
(Bye in spanish) (See you soon in spanish)
Love, Hermione, Chao! Hasta Luego!
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Fern’s secret diary
Dear diary,
Your name shall now and forever be Hermione, the best friend of Harry Potter.
Do you know, today, another inocent life was saved by me! Wilbur. My pet pig… not exactly… Dad was about to kill him cause he was a runt, but I disagreed.
He said I could keep him for a little while! I was so happy, I couldn’t even find a good word to describe it! What would you do, Hermione?\
After a week, I said ‘He is so cute! I love him!’ But dad looked miserable and said ‘Sorry, darling, he has to go to your uncle’s barn, you can go visit him…’
Imediatley, my heart felt as if it was about to break down. I pulled my heavy heart up to my bedroom and cried. I knew what they would do…
‘THEY ARE GONNA KILL HIM’ I screamed in my heart, ‘I gave him an incredible name, fed him each and every day, all that was nothing… NOTHING’
would you do the same?
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Dear Fern
Hola! sorry… that is hi in spanish.
I know what you feel like, I feel the same, once I read your things. But this world is cruel, I do disagree with that killing him…
They still stand a chance on living, why kill him, right? Imagine if you were Wilbur, whatt would you feel? Tell that to your dad.
But I am here to comfort you, chat with you, watch over you, care for you, and most importantly, love you.
Fern, trust me, he won’t die, you’ll see! I am not a fortune teller, but I feel it in my… let’s see what body parts I can mention… oh, yeah! I am a diary. In my ‘heart’
Just trust me!
(Bye in spanish) (See you soon in spanish)
Love, Hermione, Chao! Hasta Luego!
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Charlottes web, lesson 2
5 dollars
Hello, this is Andrea reporting, a very interesting scene.
Around three in the afternoon last month, a large dark brown coloured stray dog walked into the barn of the Zuckermans.
The gaurd dog took it’s own food from the river near to his new home. the Zuckermans took the Gaurd dog back and started feeding it some of the sheeps.
The gaurd dog was soon named Jupiter. Jupiter, eventually, realized he have been eating lamb chops and baby goslings. He refused to eat the rest of them and repeated the past.
Jupiter had big round, watery eyes. As seen on channel 8, 7:30 news,Jupiter Looked AT the Zuckermans using a known as ‘adorable’ look to make them give him food, play with him and even let him go fishing with them.
He always lay down on the floor while the Zuckermans have dinner. Yesterday at evening time, he hadn’t gone under the table. instead, he went to the corner and ate buy himself. he refused to play with them or go fishing.
The Zuckermans found out the reason and tried to fix it. Meanwhile, Jupiter untied the chain around his neck that was there in the afternoon.
He went to explore the barn and met the web-maker Wilbur. They became good friends and including Charlotte, they 3 formed a club. The Unique Universe.
Charlotte had made a web, though she spelled Universe wrong, they became the famous 3 in the barn. Every animal wanted to be thier friends.
Speech:
‘Very interesting’ Jodie
‘Awesome story, I love it’ Auggie
‘Love to be one of these animals, so lucky!’ Topaz
Printed, 600,000 peices
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Charlottes web, lesson 2
5 dollars
Hello, this is Andrea reporting, a very interesting scene.
Around three in the afternoon last month, a large dark brown coloured stray dog walked into the barn of the Zuckermans.
The dog became their gaurd dog and took it’s own food from the river near to his new home. the Zuckermans took the Gaurd dog back and started feeding it some of the sheep.
The gaurd dog was soon named Jupiter. Jupiter, eventually, realized he have been eating lamb chops and baby goslings. He refused to eat the rest of them and repeated the past.
Jupiter had big round, watery eyes. As seen on channel 8, 7:30 news,Jupiter Looked AT the Zuckermans using a known as ‘adorable’ look to make them give him food, play with him and even let him go fishing with them.
He always lay down on the floor while the Zuckermans have dinner. Yesterday at evening time, he hadn’t gone under the table. instead, he went to the corner and ate buy himself. he refused to play with them or go fishing together.
The Zuckermans found out the reason and tried to fix it. Meanwhile, Jupiter untied the chain around his neck that was there in the afternoon.
He went to explore the barn and met the ‘web-maker’ Wilbur. They became good friends and including Charlotte, they 3 formed a club. The Unique Universe.
Charlotte had made a web, though she spelled Universe wrong, they became the famous 3 in the barn. Every animal wanted to be thier friends.
Speech:
‘Very interesting’ Jodie
‘Awesome story, I love it’ Auggie
‘Love to be one of these animals, so lucky!’ Topaz
Printed, 600,000 peices
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Hello, this is Andrea reporting, a very interesting scene.
This news paper costs 5 dollars
Around three in the afternoon last month, a large dark brown coloured stray dog walked into the barn of the Zuckermans.
The dog became their gaurd dog and took it’s own food from the river near to his new home. the Zuckermans took the Gaurd dog back and started feeding it some of the sheep.
The gaurd dog was soon named Jupiter. Jupiter, eventually, realized he have been eating lamb chops and baby goslings. He refused to eat the rest of them and repeated the past.
Jupiter had big round, watery eyes. As seen on channel 8, 7:30 news,Jupiter Looked AT the Zuckermans using a known as ‘adorable’ look to make them give him food, play with him and even let him go fishing with them.
He always lay down on the floor while the Zuckermans have dinner. Yesterday at evening time, he hadn’t gone under the table. instead, he went to the corner and ate buy himself. he refused to play with them or go fishing together.
The Zuckermans found out the reason and tried to fix it. Meanwhile, Jupiter untied the chain around his neck that was there in the afternoon.
He went to explore the barn and met the ‘web-maker’ Wilbur. They became good friends and including Charlotte, they 3 formed a club. The Unique Universe.
Charlotte had made a web, though she spelled Universe wrong, they became the famous 3 in the barn. Every animal wanted to be thier friends.
Speech:
‘Very interesting’ Jodie
‘Awesome story, I love it’ Auggie
‘Love to be one of these animals, so lucky!’ Topaz
Printed, 600,000 peices
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Wonderful work, Andrea!
This is a really intriguing piece of writing and a fantastic idea for a new character. You have used lots of great details from the story and described what Jupiter looks like and acts like incredibly well. I love how you have made this into a story too.
To improve, you could include a bit more information about how they became friends (i.e. what qualities of Jupiter’s did Wilbur and Charlotte really like.)
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Lesson 2
Charlotte’s Web
I am the dog of Mr Zuckerman. My name is Neptune. I have a comfortable life even if I live on a farm. Everyone is very jealous of me. I live in a farmhouse with the Zuckermans. I am their guard dog. I like to eat jelly. I also like to roll in mud and look at the stars. That is where my name came from. On starry nights, I like to accompany Mr Zuckerman to gaze at the stars and planets. I never leave home without my masters. I live on a farm, but I’m not dirty. Don’t be fooled by appearances! Bye!
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We learned that we should not judge something or someone by his/her’s appearances. For example, Wilbur was a runt, but he turned out to survive. Charlotte was a spider and everyone doubted that she could save Wilbur’s life, but she did by writing words in her web. So, this book told us that we should not judge someone by his/ her’s appearances, but by what they do. And I think that everyone should listen and follow to this excellent advice.
Bye!
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Wonderful work, Caleb!
You have been very thoughtful in your considerations of the lessons learned in Charlotte’s Web. The examples you have given are excellent and you have drawn lots of wonderful morals from the text.
To improve, you could also think about some other lessons that are learned (i.e. to be brave, to fight for what you believe in).
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homework for Edward Tulane lesson 1
‘hi, what is your name? Wait a sec… you must be a doll, senorita! Let’s see… Imperio Evenasca!’ A big gold fish shouted.
‘Ahh, this is weird, where am I, I can’t breath, Big gold fish, please help me!’ Edward Tulane muffled out.
They were located in the Pacific Ocean. Edward Tulane was only meeting that big gold fish and he already knew that he was a Wizard fish.
The fish bellowed ‘Expecto Lumos!’annd he added ‘There, try breathing now,’
And indeed, he could breath. Edward asked curiously ‘So what is your name?’
‘Draco, and you?’
‘Edward, nice name!’
Draco, known as ‘the biggest potterfish’, have had his very first friend. They chatted for about an hour or two and finally,Draco said:
‘Alright, BFF, I’ll send you back up and you’ll go back to normal life, am I clear?’
‘Yes, Draco!’
‘Imperio Evenasca Opposeta!’ Draco bellowed.
‘Expecto Lumos Opposta!’ He shouted.
‘Accio Edward!’ Draco bellowed again.
Edward shot up and as told, back to normal life.
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lesson 1
The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane by Caleb Che
Lesson 1
The new character is called Arnold Humdinger. He is a very good and nice pterodactyl that keeps guard at night. He likes eating maggots and worms. He has the longest wingspan ever as he is a Quetzalcoatlus and he also eats small insects and bird eggs. His wingspan can reach up to 33-36ft long. He can weigh up to 250kg(550lbs). He lived in plains and woodlands. I hope you enjoyed my introduction on Arnold.
Bye!
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Excellent work, Caleb!
What a wonderful new character! The details you have included about what he does and how he lives are great, particularly the information about his diet.
To improve, you could add a little bit more detail about his personality and what people think of him (i.e. is he funny, does he have many friends).
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The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane
Lesson 2
KateDiCamillo makes the reader want to carry on reading because the adventures of Edward are with different people. His fate is upon the many people that picked him up. His will lies deep in his heart and his existence all starts with Pellegrina ordering a master craftsman to make him in France. Edward is just a toy, yet he has feelings. This shows us that even though your toys are non-living creatures, they still have feelings.
So, you shouldn’t hurt your toys and I hope that all of you will follow this advice.
Bye!
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